4.0 DELI SCRUBS

WE are!! This season has been great. Our usual "shoulders to lean on" have done a tremendous job of taking care of business as usual. Time for team awards for the season (premature? I think not):
Breakout season: B. Culbertson- you have been a beast and a true leadoff hitter. .700 OBP is impressive and often overlooked in adult baseball. Bunts. Walks. Solid base hits back up the box. Haven't had the pleasure of having too many conversations with you this season due to the fact that you always seem to be on the basepaths.
Balls Deep award: Jesse- mashing jacks all season and blazing the bases with the slimmed down version of yourself. Always an efficient hitter, this season has been special watching you take those violent hacks at every juicy fastball and hanging curveball.
Silver Slugger(ish) award: Skipper Skott- watching you slap purse shots down the right field line has been both surprising and a tribute to your hard work and dedication to perfecting the art of hitting. I am truly impressed and hope it carries over to the summer season. Keep slapping Skip.
Mr. Consistency award: D. Ayres- even with a gimp shoulder you put up Hall of Fame type numbers as our resident DH. It disgusts me that you could probably go to the mound and pitch underhand and still strike me out. Solid numbers as expected.
Bash Bros.: the Salvaggios- what more can I say about G and Petey? Who else can get tossed from a game and not even realize what had happened and spend an entire season without having to wash their pants? Saturdays wouldn't be the same without you guys.
Ron Jeremy award: Rob Leichtag- "Sorry guys, I was so buried in poon I forgot we had a 9:30 playoff game."
Cy Young award: Matty Wagner- no question a very impressive season. Carried us on his shoulder. We should all pitch in for his rotator cuff surgery.
Jenna Jameson award: Matt Martin- last time anyone wore that many balls in a career it had to have been her in any of the many gang bang videos she has starred in.
Top 10 award: Dan "the man" Herman- roaming centerfield and gazelle(ing) around the bases like no other. Making the web gem an ordinary feat is his game. Dan has taken away many hits and if you try to take an extra base on him he will gun you down like Osama Bin Laden. If we only had someone video taping our games he would have been the #1 & #2 top plays in Sportscenters top 10 on many a Saturday night. Do work and having fucking fun!
Freshman of the Year: Derek Clay- glad to have you aboard bud. Make sure to bring enough peanut butter and protein bars for everyone.

Excellent work, Fresh!